““But if she marries while under her vows or if she has bound herself by a rash statement, and her husband hears of it and says nothing about it on the day he hears it, then her vows shall stand and her pledge by which she bound herself shall stand. But if her husband disapproves of her [making her vow or pledge] on the day that he hears of it, then he shall annul her vow which she is under and the rash statement of her lips by which she bound herself; and the Lord will forgive her. “Every vow and every binding oath to humble herself, her husband may confirm it or her husband may annul it.”
Numbers 30:6-8, 13 AMP
When we first married, I was a hot freaking mess. And I don’t mean in the super cute way. I mean broken, immature, and an emotional wreck.
My wounds spewed forth through my words – mostly aimed at myself: I’ll never be good enough. I’ll never conceive. I’ll never understand what this means. I’ll always be this way. I’ll never have friends.
Rash words. Serious consequences.
Bless my husband. He had been taught the principle here in Numbers – that a husband had the power to reverse the curse of a rash words and vows hastily spoken.
The Hebrew word, miḇṭā’, meaning rash utterance or hasty vow, is used only twice in the Old Testament – both in this chapter – and is derived from the word bāṭā’ – meaning to speak angrily or thoughtlessly. The word bāṭā is used in Psalms 106:33 to describe how Moses spoke “recklessly” with his lips, because he was angry, and in Proverbs 12:18 to compare how words spoken rashly are like thrusts of a sword – in other words, they inflict damage.
In Numbers 30:6, the Hebrew word for bound means to place in a prison. In other words – rash words – which most often spew out of anger, negative emotion, or a broken and wounded heart – have the power to imprison us. Yikes.
As spouses and parents, our ears should be attuned to rashly spoken words we hear uttered. We’ve tried to be intentional with one another and our children to respond to the harsh words with truth so they do not have the power to bind us or our children. Sometimes that looks like long conversations to discover the pain behind the words. Sometimes it looks like asking what voice they are echoing – the voice of Truth or the voice of the enemy. Sometimes it looks like repentance and restoration if they’re just echoing us. And always it looks like praying over and speaking a blessing of truth to replace the lie.
Words have power – especially those spoken rashly – because they often are preceded by “I will never” or “I will always” statements that have the power to turn the painful phrase or feeling into a vow. But when confronted with the Truth, when measured against His Word and His promises, we have the power to break curses and shepherd the souls of the people we love the most.
The picture today is of a quote I read recently that is applicable today: never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal. (Attributed to many people online – most frequently Samuel Johnson)
May I be ever mindful of the cost of my words and measure them accordingly.
Father – thank You for Vance’s wisdom and protection – especially in the early days. Bring a crop failure to words I’m unaware of that I’ve sown. Bring them to mind that I might repent and restore. Guard my heart and tongue. May my words bring life and freedom. May my children’s words be filled with life and freedom. You are good. Your leadership in my life is perfect and You can be trusted. Amen.