I once was blind


 “…She even began to humiliate him while his strength departed from him.”

‭‭Judges‬ ‭16:19‬ ‭TLV‬‬

“…Then she began to abuse Samson, and his strength left him.”

‭‭Judges‬ ‭16:19‬ ‭AMP‬‬

“…Then she began to torment him, and his strength left him.”

‭‭Judges‬ ‭16:19‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

I was struck this morning by Delilah’s actions and the fact that Samson stayed. I dare say it even made me angry. Why would he stay after being manipulated three times? She proved she wasn’t trust worthy. The Bible says he loved her – but clearly that was one sided. 

I’ve experienced a one sided love relationship before – it was abusive and the person was manipulative. I’ve been in abusive relationships – relationships that leave me feeling like Samson in verse 16 – “vexed.” And while I am questioning Samson’s wisdom and why he might have stayed, I have to turn the mirror on myself – why did I stay? I honestly don’t know – maybe it was love but I doubt it. 

Samson was captured, his strength lost, and his eyes gouged out. But G-d caused his hair to grow once again and restored his strength so that he was greater in death than in his life:

“Then Samson called to the Lord, saying, “O Lord God, remember me, I pray! Strengthen me, I pray, just this once, O God, that I may with one blow take vengeance on the Philistines for my two eyes!” …Then Samson said, “Let me die with the Philistines!” And he pushed with all his might, and the temple fell on the Lords and all the people who were in it. So the dead that he killed at his death were more than he had killed in his life.”

‭‭Judges‬ ‭16:28, 30‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The encouragement to my heart today is this: when I am blinded by abuse, torment, and humiliation at the hands of others, G-d will restore me. While I don’t believe G-d intends for us to stay in abusive relationships, I am reminded that all things can be used for His good – even my brokenness. Thankfully G-d provided an escape for me from a physically abusive relationship and thankfully I’ve learned how to set boundaries to remove myself from the emotionally abusive ones. But the hope is found in this: when I am abused or manipulated, when my soul is vexed and I feel blinded by the pain, G-d will restore me. Give me eyes to see You, Father, in all things. 

Father, thank You for Your word that heals and restores. For those broken by an abusive relationship or friendship, restore their vision today. Give them Your eyes and Your perspective into the situation. You are good. Your leadership in my life is perfect and You can be trusted. Amen. 

Daily Reading: Judges 16-18